A Day In My Life...

It's a few days till Halloween and one of our favorite parties of the year. The DH and I make more plans according to going to Disturbathon than any other thing we do all year. This year is different. I'm excited about going, it's fun and I'm more than half way through my costume plan but my grandmother is in Hospice. I'm thinking to myself, what do I do if she dies before this weekend?

I feel like such a terrible person for even thinking this way.

So I went to this show on sort of on a whim. If you don't know, it's Jackson Rathbone's (Jasper from Twilight) band. I'd hit the band website and the music wasn't terrible. It wasn't really music that I would buy, but not terrible. The songs on the site sounds like a jam band, a band you'd enjoy in your favorite dive while you kicked back at a table and drank your favorite beverages.

This show was being played in the middle of TwiCon 2009 and if you wonder what that is, it is the largest conference of it's kind inspired by Stephanie Meyers and the Twilight Saga. If you're familiar with ComicCon, imagine ComicCon for only one series and you have TwiCon. Let me say that I really love the Twilight Saga. I've read the books multiple times, seen the movie multiple times, even have some Twilight merchandise. However, I'd say at least 50% of the concert-goers here were fangirls from TwiCon. Someone asked me what a fangirl was and Urban Dictionary defines is as:

Most I encountered at the show were definitely definition Numero Uno. I like to sometimes call myself definition Numero Dos, but I was most assuredly put to shame last night in my low level of fan-worship.

There were 2 opening acts, first was a local (meaning Dallas) band called Dovetail and they said on stage that this was one of their first shows and they were good. Those of you who love you some Old 97s, you should check these guys out. I'd like to see them in another venue with less focus on Jackson.

The second opening band was one of the most terrible things I've witnessed in a long time. The National Rifle (yes I even linked to them) is touring with 100 Monkeys and from Pittsburgh. I don't know why but then again, I don't know why many do what they do. First thing I noticed in this band was this dude wandering around the stage when they started. He jumped around stage and ran around, he stopped to bang on a drum out of rhythm, he did nothing but jack around during the first song. Then, he picked up a bass and begin to play but we wondered for the second and third song if he was even plugged in. The lead singer reminded me of Bruce Springsteen, not with his voice or demeanor, but he look. There was a girl in the band, she played keyboards and also banged on that random drum and looked like she had just left a Go-Go's concert in '83. The strange guy, he channeled an insane mediocre drug dealer I was familiar with in the 90's that creeped me out so that was against him from the second he was on stage. Then, when he started playing the base, he played just like Wes Borland when he was in Limp Bizkit, crouched low to the ground and head bangin' even though their music was nothing to even bob your head to, much less head bang. These guys were so bad, a security guard offered us ear plugs. No Joke!

With that tragedy successfully past us, we waited for the piece de resistance, 100 Monkeys, Jackson Rathbone, it was what we all paid our meager $20 to see. When the show began, the five band members were joined by at leat two additional guys to jam. Our instincts were right, this was a jam band but what we never expected was the musical talent these five guys had. Each member was well-versed on multiple instruments and most even took a turn singing lead. The guys were charasmatic and fun to watch - it says a lot when you can tell the band is enjoying themselves on stage and these guys were doing it.

Rathbone started the set on a Les Paul that was a work of art and was channeling his inner-Johnny Depp and doing it well. I was a bit bummed that there was no one in a banana costume as you see on their site. One of the high points in their set was they decided they would make up a song right there on the spot. The band asked the audience what they wanted a song about and I'm not sure how it came about, but the decision was made that the song would be called, Mr. Peeping Tom. He took his guitar off and handed it off to exclaim, "I've gotta sing on this one!"

The band begin to play and he started belting out lyrics off the cuff that were funny, but did rhyme, and the band played as if they had been rehearsing the tune for weeks. Epic line from the song, "Mr. Peeping Tom watches with an eerie calm, through my window."

I left the show pleasantly surprised that this band was worth the $20 and not just because this pseudo-fangirl got to stand close to Jasper Hale. I also have to note that the band gave everyone at the show a free CD, and 100 Monkeys sat and signed autographs during the opening acts and were gracious and pleasant.

Paladium is a cool venue. It's clean, smoke-free (yay!), and Korin, the bartender, rawks! Loved her! Will be putting myself on the email list for this venue since so many of the venues I loved are gone. Maybe I've found a new favorite.

So it's been a month since I've even been "here" to my humble little corner of the blogosphere. I've neglected this room to be sure but I've had a lot a self induced drama or maybe it's just that the drama has induced self-inflicted pain and misery on myself.

Marriage is hard work and the biggest difference (to me personally) between being in a marriage and being in a serious relationship without that legality is that the marriage document forces you to not walk away when you get your feelings hurt, you're bored, you have a difference of opinion on something one party thinks is very important, or a rash of too many other things to list things that in a non-marital relationship you can just go, "Y'know this isn't too much fun for me anymore and I'm tired of not really liking you very much so I'm out...peace." At least in my humble opinion, you agree when you marry, that you're going to work and try every option available to you, not leave any rock unturned, to try to push through the periods of displeasure to come up with a happier set of circumstances and to assure yourself you will not die alone. Maybe that's not the Cinderella story you little girls out there grew up with but it's reality through my eyes and I've never been one to look through rose colored glasses. My husband is my best friend. He is the first person I want to talk with when something happens unless of course that something would be some dumb thing he did to irritate the fool out of me and then I turn to my tried and true best girl friends of course. I've been learned about marriage, or at least my marriage, while I've been away and these are some of the things I'm mulling over.

I've been for all intents and purposes in my mind, unemployed since November of last year. That has been one huge bitter pill for me to swallow. I've been gainfully, and well employed since I was 16. People that is a little over 20 years. I'm not in a position or an economy where I either am over-qualified for the positions or under-qualified for the positions and that is a very few positions that are out there. I've been doing work. I substitute taught last school year which was hellish and a blessing all at once. I wonder if that is sort of want S&M is all about - pain tinged with a hint of pleasure. I digress...but still - most of it was hellish. As a substitute, you are perceived as a 2nd class citizen in the education world. Countless times I felt like I was being talked to like a wealthy person would speak to the hired house help. Eck, see...I said bitter pill ya'll! I am college educated and have a decent resume, I do the job that I did until last November very very well and so it was very hard to be treated like a person incapable of doing any sort of complex task. The pleasure part of substituting was the sweet kids that you loved to be around and I had a few favorites and the sheer amount of hilarity that was said on a daily basis.

1st grader: I had my birthday this weekend!
Me: Oh, happy birthday, what did you get?
1st grader: I got uh PSP and my mom and dad bought me Talladega Nights but told me I could only have it if I promised not to say the bad words at school.

2nd grader: Guess whut! I got healed at church last night!
Me: Excuse me?
2nd grader: I went up on the stage with my preach cuz I had a headache and mah legs were hurtin' and he put his hand on mah head and then, Bam! He pushed me back and I wus healed!

Oh yeah, that's just a couple of exchanges of the top of my head. Sometimes the kids were really funny but most of the time I thought, I'm getting paid $80 to babysit. So, although I have some contract work I'm doing now and it is picking up, I've been invited back to Sub again next school year but now according to Senate Bill 9, it is now a requirement for me to be fingerprinted and I have to go pay $50 to have that done and it just tweaks my melon that a business would ask you to foot the cost of something they have to have for you to work with them.

I've been reading again in the last six months a lot. Probably more than I have read since I got out of college and maybe even more than then. I got sucked in to the Twilight mania and the Sookie Stackhouse stories. Why the heck would anyone name their heroine Sookie? I hate it but I'm dealing. This also means I'm sucked in to True Blood although I'm not impressed with the core cast, Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer. Moyer is ok I guess for Bill Compton because I've imagined him as a bit curmedgeoning and Moyer seems to bring that to the screen but I don't like Paquin as Sookie. I don't think it's the actress because I like her fine in X-Men and The Piano was a great movie and she brought no offense to my eyes (that sounded very Bill don't ya think) but she just doesn't do it for me in this role. My favorites in TB series are Eric and Pam so far. I like Sam and love LaFayette and am so glad he wasn't killed in the show like he was in the books. I love Tara who is not at all like Harris' portrayal.

I've always wanted to write and I've had one book idea for a number of years and another one blossomed in my mind in the last few months but I've never ad a lot of confidence in my creative side of my brain. I'm very good in logic and facts. I can write anything given the facts but to create something from the grey matter between my ears is just a bit terrifying. However, I'm going to begin to exercise those muscles and am going to give a shot at fanfic. I've got the first chapter laid out but I want to do a short one first, maybe three chapters tops, and put it out "there" and get some feedback on it. Then I will see if I've got the chops to do more.

Ok, this blog update is upwards of 1,100 words now and that's a bit much for a blog in my opinion. Thanks for listening and feel free to comment.

Ciao

Want
Want
Want
Always something I'm asked to give
Give food
Give help
Give touch
Give attention
Give ear
Give hand
Give mind
Give self
Is there anything left of me?

This Nursing  & Rehab facility is so for profit it is ridiculous.

My grandmother is currently a resident there and this facility has no standard of communication within its ranks. My family has met with everyone at this facility about the communication issues we have had but today really takes the cake.

My dad was hit with a $15,000 bill this morning. Yep. the cost of some cars.The accounting department says "someone" failed to file the appropriate documentation with Medicaid and so they haven't been paid for the last 4 months but even though there was a faillure on their side, it is our responsibility to correct the deficit in my grandmother's bill to reside there. No one is stepping up to accept the blame for screwing this up.

My grandmother cannot be cared  for at home. She is in end stage Dementia and we are not able to care for her at home. She needs 24/7 care and sometimes even now, it isn't enough.

I could go on for days about the problems we've had comminication-wise with the people that work at ManorCare. Miscommunication about care plan meetings, miscommunications about issues with my grandmother, miscommunications about billing.

I don't know how these people even sleep at night knowing that they do this to people in this condition and their families.